The Ranger
by A Combination of Madness
Summary: Luna Park inspired... plus a tonne load of sugar... and two crazy individuals who have known each other for WAY to long! :D  and you get The Ranger
1. Chapter 1

**The Ranger**

**Words: who cares**

'Guys, guys, guys!' Gilan shouted running into Will's cabin where Halt and Will were reading boring old reports. Then he started giggling.

All most at once Halt looked up. It was always worrying when one of his old apprentices started giggling. They were either really ill, or about to do something that was bound to annoy him. Seeing Gilan's face, he decided it was the later,

"I have just found the most perfect thing to do on a day off ever!' he said and bounced up and down on the spot.

'Well, unfortunately, we aren't on an off day,' Will snapped, annoyed that Gilan was able to do whatever he wanted while he was stuck there, without Alyss, doing reports.

Halt sensing that it was going to be a long conversation stood up and moved to the sink. Here he began to make a pot of coffee.

"So" he said turning his head slightly in Gilan's direction. "What is this marvellous thing that has captivated you on your lucky! Day off!"

"Ha! Well, I was walking through town, when I saw the circus had arrived! And they have a new ride! It is the most amazing thing ever!'

'What's a circus?' Will asked confused.

'Something new from Tortoll,' Halt said dismissively. Will continued to stare at him. Gilan however, was already talking again, as he had ignored every interruption that had occurred.

'Anyway, I was watching the people on it scream their heads off and a couple of them actually threw up.' Halt groaned as he realised he had missed Gilan describing what it was.

"But the best thing about it, other than the money falling from the sky!" At this halt's head rose and he looked at Gilan with an eyebrow raised. "Is the fact that it is called 'The Ranger' its destiny is to be ridden on by us!'

'What? Like a horse?' Will asked.

'You'll find out. Crowley was with me when I found it and I asked him I could come back and go on it with you guys. And guess what he said?' Gilan asked excitedly.

'We had to do work?' Halt said hopefully.

'Nope! You guys can come!' he yelled and dragged them out the door, only giving them enough time to grab their cloaks.

After a couple of hours of fast riding Halt was so tempted to ask if they were almost there.

'Just around this corner,' Gilan muttered like he had been all morning. They rounded the corner and Will fell off Tug in either fright or astonishment.

The circus tent was HUGE! It was taller than anything they had ever seen before! Sixty feet tall and one hundred feet wide! Who am I kidding; it was bigger than Redmont castle. Am I kidding anyone now?

I don't know how big it was, that isn't one of my strong points. After Will had pulled himself from the floor and told Tug that he was a "mean horsie" for just laughing and not doing anything he groaned really loudly because Crowley was coming over.

'I ssssssheard sssthat Will,' he slurred. Halt looked at him with an eyebrow raised.

'Have you been at the drink again?' Halt asked.

'No! The ccccccccccccciiii …. Ciiiirrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr…. , whatever. They came with something called vvvvvvvvvvvvvvvooooo…. Vooooooooooooooooo… vooooooodicka,' he slurred. Even Gilan had to raise his eyebrow at that.

"You mean Vodka?" Will asked.

"yesssssssss, thatsssss it!" Crowley yelled slapping him on the back in a jovial manner. He paused creasing his forehead slightly puzzled, and thinking hard.

"How'd you know that?"

"Oh, um Alyss ordered it for the wedding."

**I am staying at my best friend's house at the moment and this is our joint fanfic. Scary right? It was thought up and the plot (if there is one) was discussed whilst on a ride at Luna Park. It was written when we had a lot too many warheads. **

**Now we are like dead…**

**The next chapter will be up when it will. So don't bother waiting for it. That doesn't mean that you can't review and add this to your alert list though…we suggest you do! **

**If anyone where wanting to know more about this brilliant story please visit either of our profiles:**

**Alyss: .net/u/2116372/Alyss_Mainwaring (as if you didn't already know, and if you didn't then bananas!)**

**Vanity: .net/u/2273671/Vanity_Storm **

**Vintage- "strawberry"**

**Vanity- "Imagine all the people!" **

**Alyss Mainwaring (Vintage)**

**Jenny Dalby (Vanity)**


	2. The Lelephant

**Helloooo earthlings long time no talk... sadnessssss... **

**ahhhh welll here is the long long long awaited second chapter... :D **

**hopefully its as hilarious as wanted and brings a smile to thou faces **

**lots of icky and sticky loveydoveyness ? WTF? i dont even know ahh welll **

**xx **

**VANITY AND VINTAGE **

* * *

><p>"Oh is that right? Drinkssss all round then!" Crowley slurred again.<p>

"Will!" will turned around and saw a figure stumbling out of the circus tent.

"Horace" he said gleefully.

'Get a load of this!" Horace said gesturing excitedly around him "its bloody amazing"

He took hold of wills wrist and dragged him towards the circus tent. They ducked under the flap and will almost shat himself. The inside of the tent was massive. There was a freakishly long pole at the centre holding up the roof and smaller ones scattered around the walls.

In the middle was a ring and in the centre of that was a platform. On top to the platform was an a humongous grey creature with massive ears. It was balancing on top of a round multi-coloured object.

"What in heaven's name is that?" will asked curelessly.

"it's called a…. leleephant… no wait. Elefunt… elefun **(A/N bahahhahahhahaha lol ) **…. Ele…. Ele…eleph… elephan…t …. Yeah an elephant. They're scared of mice. Watch this." Horace pulled form his coat pocket a small brown mouse. Within a few seconds the elephant thing had caught sight of the mouse and its long nose had shot into the air with a tremendous wail of horror. It lost its balance on the round ball and came tumbling down onto the stage. The stage couldn't hold under the pressure of the enormous elephant and so snapped and splintered .

Horace burst out laughing and another chuckle could be heard form behind them. will turned and his eyes fell upon halts grim face. he then looked across to the other person who was indeed a pissed Crowley .

"oh! Golly good hahahahahha nice going Horace! I shall tell king Duncan to promote you for that. It was brilliant!" he paused and started pensively at the ground.

"Duncan." He said soflty. "what a ridiculous name… ridiculous. Hahahahahhaha dick ahahahhaha"

Will shook his head and turned back to Horace. "where this ranger thing we are meant to ride?"

"of that's out here." Horace motioned to the the other side of the tent where a small gap could be seen.

They all filed over and ducked through the flap. They were meet with blinding sunlight on the other side and blinking back black spots their eyes landed upon a massive structure. Granted it was smaller then the circus tent, but it was bigger than the elephant.

It was all made out of metal bars and it seemed to be a suspended ship in mid air. Will heard halt gag

"we are seriously going on that are we."

"yessssssss, thou issssss." Crowley slapped halt on the back. Cheer up old man! it's not as if it goes on water! It just goes upside down!"

Halt proceeded to faint.

"ohhhh, that'sssss a sssshhhame…. Ahhhhhh well just place him in anywaysss… he'll probably wake up when it's upside down, do him goood." Crowley heaved halts unconscious body over to the ride.

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><p><strong>bahahhahahahahaha bye see you peeeeeeepppppsss next time :D *dies laughing*<strong>


End file.
